Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Srinagar Ramadhan 2011 | The city of the beggars

I am good at classifying stuff.. So here it goes!

Beggars in Srinagar are divided into three categories based on where they come from.

1) People from Kashmir who can speak Kashmiri. Rudest!
2) People from Kashmir who cannot speak Kashmiri. Gujjar!
3) People from other states. Stuck Up!

Category number 1:

"Bobaaaii" "Boobaiiii" "Yemas notwanas kun ditaw nazrah bobaaiii"

A question comes into my mind! Why are these beggars so into "Bobaaaii". Why cant they search for "Baijann's". Do they have an undisclosed intention to look at the womenfolk of the houses. Or do they find it easy enough to convince the 'female' human to give them alms. There are some who call the "Haij Saheboooo", usually the better version.

This category is further divided into two, adhering with natural law of sexes:

1) Adult Males, always bearded, with a satchel.
2) Adult Females, always with a burqa, armed with emotional attacks.

Category number 2:

Guys can be seen sporting a beard with a golden colour. This reflects a past usage of henna on these beards. The guys can be often seen with sticks, and "Rabdi Boot" (Rubber Shoes). These are the people who dont live in the city, and are nomads. They are ready to shove a paper on your face that proves they or someone close to them is sick and they want money to buy medicine etc. This happens when you give them a fiver, and they dont feel satisfied.

This category, I further divide into two also, with a slight addition to the previous category:

1) Adult Males, shy, often asking for food.
2) Adult Females with a baby, mostly are accompanied by a male.

Category number 3:

It seems, many of the states in India are outsourcing their beggar-related-services to our state. Why not? At this time of the year, Muslims all over the state are ready to donate and give alms generously. The holy month of Ramadhan makes charity more rewarding. However, the main motive is to take a percentage of wealth from the rich and give to the poor. Begging is not allowed, as per Islam.

"Didi" "Arey ou didi"
Same question! Why dont they ask for the "Bhayaas". It humiliates me when I take a tenner to hand over to them, but all of them want a female to come out. Mysterious!

A look near the famous bakery shops of Kashmir, such as Jee Enn, Mughal Darbar etc can clearly give us a good idea. You walk past and they catch your leg, raise their hands to their chin, and make a sign that they are hungry. They are seen changing clothes in public places. Tsk Tsk!

This category is as diverse as the many places from where they come from:

1) Male kids, as annoying as a mosquito
2) Female kids, accompanied with smaller kids, begging in the middle of the road
3) Adult females, the mothers of the above two categories
4) Old males, random bearded people, in a charecteristic urdu accent
5) Old females, rare to find! But exist nevertheless

One reason I didnt put "Adult Males" in this category is that they would be busy working as common labourers. However it is not strcitly followed in many places.

Alex Smart got annoyed and said:

The funniest thing is they are rude! It is not compulsory to give them. If you dont, they act as though you have purchased a diamond watch from them, and you are refusing to pay them for it. Such a dirty look. But that doesnt end there. Then they talk about how you were raised by your dad and your "bobaiii", and start getting all personal. You give them a little amount of money, and they get ruder.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Independence Day in Kashmir

A majority of the shops remained closed. The roads bore a deserted look, with an occasional maruti 800 rushing by. The local city bus services remained suspended as well. However, the funniest thing is the suspension of the "mobile service". This was claimed to be a part of the I-Day security measures.


What about internet???? According to GK, various news organisations and portals in the valley failed to update their websites.

Talk about freedom. Well, public interest comes first though!

While CM Omar blamed some factors for unrest in the valley, he should also realize that "taali ek haat se nai bajti". Newspapers are full of incidents where the unrest had been provoked by some other circumstances. People do have emotions, people do react- it seriously doesnt matter whether those factors exist or not. As for me they just exist to mark spots on the calendar, otherwise believe me, the protests would continue and continue forever. Something minor provokes the people, and they all end up shouting slogans of azadi. Our beloved young CM should have a look into that.

The good thing is I-Day functions passed off peacefully. No one died, apparently no one was hurt. Alhamdulillah.

Alex Smart Said:

Apparently they forgot to take the shoes of people. Shoes can be potential security hazards, as history has shown.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Kashmiri terminology during Ramadhan

Deheldees: Noun. A term given to a person who doesnt fast. Also known as DehelKhaw.

TaapeSahar: Noun. A meal taken when its sunny to make a "Deheldees" (see above) not feel guilty.

Iftiyaar: Kashmiri for Iftar, people add the extra 'y' to put more stress on how tired the feel after all that fasting.

Taraweeh: It doesnt matter if you pray 8 or 20, as long as you go in between to stroll around and then resume praying.

SaharKhan: A person who goes around with a drum, in the early hours, with the intention to wake people up. Usually is not familiar with the modern technology of the alarm.

Mughal Darbar: A shop, usually all bread items are brought from here. Situated near "Sunday Market" where all stolen (?) goods are available very cheap on sundays.

Alex Smart said: "Wakte Sahar, yus ne wothhe su kheyhey zahar" - Time to wake, those who dont may gladly eat some poison.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Jannet E Kashmir Shameema Dev mp3

Here is the link to download the popular song! Videos are available on the internet elsewhere!

Download Jannat E Kashmir by Shameema Dev!

Happy Ramadhan!