Saturday, April 21, 2007

DustBin Unlimited

As the most eligible bachelor of the country, Abhishek Bachchan, weds the most beautiful woman in the world, Aishwarya Rai, Kashmir wasn't disturbed at all.

 I happened to open my Tv yesterday and expected to see everywhere the marriage of the superstars ( Ash and Abhi )tele-casted on every possible channel. After a few clicks on the BPL remote, I couldnt even search for one channel that aired the news of the wedding. All I could see was my school. 
(Wait a minute, MY SCHOOL????).

 Excited, I started wathching a particular news channel. Then I figured that somehow the marriage wasnt enough BIG enough, as a much bigger news was shown everywhere. Burn Hall School, Oh no! Maybe a publicity stunt so that the name of our school may reside on every Bolly-Wood fan's Mouth and be the topic of his mother-in-law (Ahmmm). 

Or does it contain some truth. 

 For those who dont know what I am Talking about, they should wait for a post in which I will get the matter cleared. Studying in "the famous" School will surely help. 
Until ThenGo here: Going here will immediately fill you in... 

Now back to my trademark writing style.

Any fool can criticize,
And many of them do,
You are welcome to join them,
- If that's OK with you…”
 (I also criticize, so let me tell you.) 
 (I believe I am a better critic than you.)

 All the readers are welcome to express their views and suggestions, please find the ‘comment’ link below and try to click it. If you can’t then don’t blame yourself; it could be the mouse that could be the culprit or your brain for lack of comments... 

 ”To err is human. To really foul things up requires a computer”.

—(I have one, and you have one in front of you).

Well,  I just thought that writing stuff like this initially gets the reader to think that he has stumbled upon interesting stuff, but believe me you can safely shut down your brains while reading this. I just came across this idea when I read this… “Please don't throw your cigarette butts on the floor, the cockroaches are getting cancer.” Ok! Enough of the lovely stuff and all the huge smiles on your faces. 
Main Stuff Starts Now:

Let us get right into criticizing the poor Kashmiri... During my stay at the Hospital, I observed a lot of things which is common in the Kashmiris. The usage of the dustbin is one such thing that all Kashmiris have in common. The dustbin is a very lucky creature in Kashmir. (From now on whenever I shall speak of dustbins, I shall mean the ones on the road, hospitals, public places and not the ones which are inside the houses.). It was meant to swallow junk but all one can find is that the junk outside it and the street dogs inside it. (Busy throwing out the junk that somehow falls inside it.). I decided to sacrifice one hour and see the hourly usage of a typical dustbin. 

I chose one for my experiment at a beautiful garden of Srinagar. I found (finally) a clean place to sit and directed my eyes towards the dustbin. For one whole hour, I saw people of all kinds moving past that dustbin. The thing I observed was truly an astonishing one. Only the NRKs (Non-Resident-Kashmiris) observed that piece of cylindrical metal on the ground and threw the occasional chips packet into it. The rest of us Kashmiris either didn’t notice it and even if they did, the junk from their hands landed neatly outside the dustbin. 

 In the recent years there has been a gradual increase in the number of houses in the urban settlements. The most popular of the urban settlements is a place called HYDER-PORA (It lies in district Bud-gam ---which literally means “The Big Village”). As a universal rule urban settlements are more planned than the actual town/city (and Hyder-pora is no exception to this). Studded with multimillion houses with multimillion spent on their construction, their owners consider themselves belonging to the elite group. (Please do forgive me if you do). 

In comparison I live in downtown, which boasts of a limited number of such palaces. But both places being situated in Kashmir have their common nucleus of habits. Yes, the age old habit of not using Dustbins. In most places (usually posh areas) if you come across a vacant plot, be ready to see as the end-place of all the junk from the local houses. The respectable Kashmiris clean out their houses and make their surroundings unclean. (What a sense of hygiene). In the hospitals of the valley, the scene is no different. Countless heaps of uneaten rice and food are seen in the toilets (What a humiliation of Allah’s given gift). Their not only exists the factor of disregard towards ‘Riziq’ (Food) but also the fact that the hospital guys find it hard to clean them every day. The people who do such things are (surely) unaware of the dustbins provided by the hospitals. The Kashmiris have learnt to listen to English songs. They now know the difference between ‘Shakira’ and ‘Ricky Martin’, they are familiar with rap songs, they prefer jeans over the traditional clothes, they wear designer sun-glasses (believe me even inside the houses), they wear classy wristwatches, ---in short they are turning to the stylish western culture but the point is that they still don’t know what ‘using a dustbin’ means.. 

 Finale: Ants can learn to walk backwards, the sun can sleep overtime (can it), but the Kashmiri will never learn to use the dustbin. 

Grand finale: Actually they use one, and this one is better known as the stomach. So Which one do you use?