Best of all...



In a guttural voice of his, a voice worth hearing…

A voice which Pinta keenly wants to imititate…

The voice of Mr. Bashir Mir ( Or Mir Bashir, whatever the case maybe ).

This Post is a collection of just some incidents (which I wish to forget but they are too important) featuring “the voice”.

Pinta loves Eldin Bleze…

The dialogues..

Pinta finds him amusing…

Some find him clever…

Others regard him as the only teacher..

Some say he uses abusive language…

Others say he knows the way of proper teaching…

Still others regard him as a comedian …

And

I

Like

Him

Because

I

Have

A

Blog

Running

Under

His

Name…

What if he copyrights the name…

Then who will have the right to copy his personality…

Anyways

“ A teacher teaches,

A good teacher explains,

A best teacher guides….”

]

“Is baag ki shaaqh pe ulu bethey hain…

batao andaz-e-gulistaan kya hoga…”

The room in which he teaches us has a khatam-band ceiling (carved walnut wood)…

At one end lies a glass slab painted white on the other side..

Our class (Mamoon’s 12th) is meant to start at 7.30 in the morning…

which means people like me who stay far far away from karan nagar must leave their houses at 7.00 when the sky is still dark and the atmosphere is filled with “Dua-e-subah” and “Aurad-e-fathiya”…

I go there in our car..

Several people stop to stare at us as we break the mach speed in order to reach there in time..

Stop.

I cautiously get off the car with a kangri in my hand, give it back to the person who drives (sometimes Pa, sometimes our driver)..

I make my way to the place..

.

The place of the huge gathering

Yes!!

A huge gathering..

One door…

All waiting for it to open…

The countdown begins..

10

.

9

.

8.

.

7

.

6

.

5

.

4

.

3.

.

2

…….

…….

1

The door creaks open..

The pushing begins…

All are seen with a white card in their hands..

Their entrance ticket..

Push..

Ugggh

Oof

Aayey (kashmiri anguish cry)

I also try to get in..

Yes!!! Finally I am in!!

Keeping my footwear on the footwear of another person., I drag my feet inside the class finding boys wearing all sorts of things…After talking about 15 minutes discussing important issues, Bashir sir is seen entering the room…

Only the torso visible, the legs not seen due to the torsos of studnts..

Quack!! Quack!! Make way!

It appears as if a duck id swimming in the water..

Quack!!

Adjustment is done…

The boys are made to compress together…

“Hata paku ukun!!”

“Ou idhar 5 aadmey pohunchey gey..”

“peknaw yem pache ukun”

//Move away!!

// Hey you 5 humans can fit here

// move your hooves away

Start…

“Han to jesa ki aaf ne ( Yup it is aaf ne) kal padha tha…”

and thus he begins…

ooof..

all this stupidness has booored me…

here is(are) some typical Kashmiri proverbs…

(with a dash of sauce)

  1. En senz kolai khudayas hawale
    //A blind man’s wife is in God’s keeping
  2. Kokri henzi dige che ne pooit maran.
    //Chicken cant die from the blow of a hen.
  3. Reyi chu shabnam sehlaab.
    //An ant finds dew as flood.
  4. Gade maraan koli manz treshi hoch.
    //The fish die of thirst in the pond
  5. Oun kya zane pron bate.
    //What does a blind man know about quality rice?
  6. Gari ne way, nebre tie.
    //No food at home, yet in formals you roam.

That was Kashmiri ancestor made…

Now here’s some new mamoon made..

CHEMISTRY OF A WOMAN:

//The scientific analysis of a compound called woman..

Element: woman

Symbol: Wo

Discoverer: Adam

Mass: Most acceptable at 55 kg, known to vary widely from 35kg to 70kg .

Occurrence: Widely spread, appears in the most unexpected places, found in areas of habitation.

PROPERTIES:

  1. Boils at nothing and freezes without apparent reason..
  2. Melts upon special treatment.
  3. Dangerous if incorrectly used.
  4. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
  5. Has great affinity for gold and “Kahani ghar ghar ki”.
  6. Highly repulsive if in contact with another molecule.
  7. Ummm. That’s all I have.

At the end some thing in Kashmiri, remember it is more funnier in kashmiri.

For those who cannot understand this language I have sympathy…

“ Hello…Hello… hataz salaam haz kermuw..

ye kya sa boozum tse chuy marun…Han?

Brain Tumour in the intestines..?

Hai hai kyah goum..

Akh naseehat karai

Yethne taam hogaade, aanchar, muje-tsut, ya thool khekh…

Away pyoum telephone karun…

Sawaal chu ath dedis ma chu wen kanh yelaaj…

Yene dawaah khyekh zi doudey gasi khatam…

Pate ma pheri choun…

Acha garz aousum ne ye wanas…

Boz boz

Me prus akis peeras ( peeran che na sariy patah aasaan)

Me wonmus…

Hata yaare shothus ha zu gaz door aeseth kangri set nare tot khasaan chu...

Su woth oure Reshi phashi hina deth…

“ Allah tala chu raheem te kareem! emis dostas wan. ki dah saas te dah rupye Karen pagah shamas taen niyaz… beye satan kokren henz wante trawen ganten….

Beye karun kath qurban…

Beye…

Beye…

Hello…

Hello…

Besides I wanna show you the pictures inside eldin bleze, can SOMEBODY TEACH ME WITHOUT GETTING CAUGHT AND GETTING A GOOD VIEW..

comments

The Voice...

Pinta is amazed...
Fame gurukul..
Sa re ga ma pa...
Indian idol...

All sorts of super stars...

And..
One...
Really

Honestly

is from the State that we claim as ours...

The ones who shares a part of his name with me...

Qazi..

Qazi..

Ladies and Gentlemen..

Let me present the only singster from the valleeeyyy...

QAZI TOUQEER...

and i am your host Qazi Mamoooonnn...

.
.
.
.and so on and so forth...

Pinta wants to be a Qazi....

not the one who earlier was supposed to be a judge..

" jab miyaan biwi razi, to kya karega Qazi"

{cant translate it well enough...maybe if any one can comment}

And after lots of ours of Bathroom singing and shouting....
He is ready to sing before his friends...

A latest hit of Himesh...

Unfortunately...

Really unfortunately...

Pinta is no Himesh Reshamiya..

After three minutes of singing...

His friends.
.
....
.....
.......
.........
...........
Lauugh....

" A starved crow,, please anyone feed him..."

" What a voice,, makes me to go to sleep..."

" Help help!!! Fire alarm"

" Oh look at that poor poor beggar,, how he sings to get some money!!"

" aay meri meri zohra jabeen
furqat-e-gham bulagha..

Jum-e-raat raat hai aaja, saath saath nibhaja...

"



THE KASHMIRI IDOL:

Milay sur....

A kashmiri version of the programs listed above..
Only on DD Kashir..

and
and
and

Pinta has seen its advertisement...

so..

Once upon a time in a place called Tagore hall, a long line of people was to be seen..

And our Beloved Pinta was also seen..

The lady with the red burqa was also seen..

and so was our locality's sweeper.... { not localities }

There was the doodhwala..

And the roti wala..

the rouney wala...

the hasney wala...

the gusey wala..

the sharmila..

the furteela...

and last but growing like yeast..

was the partnership between Sachin and M.S.Dhoni..


The first auditions of Miley Sur And first stage appearence of Pinta....

And he sung...


" sakhiyow roothum haiiy ......... gasith byoothum haiiy gammniy..."

The judges smiled....

as of course they couldnt laugh...

That would be..

Izat ki Beizzati for PInta..


finally they encouraged him and let go for another chance in the next round..

But that was scheduled for next week..

The question is that will Pinta become a superstar....

Answer in the next edition of

Eldin Bleze

Next Week..

Same time...

So meet you then..

And dont forget the Photo essay of Jamia Masjid, Srinagar by Asma Yasrib..@ Yemberzal.org { or is it Yembarzal. org } comments

Time pass

Khudi ko kar buland itna ki har taqdeer se pehle...

Khuda Pintay se Khud poochay

Bata teri Raza kya hai...

PINTA:
hai yeh Kashmeeer
meri taqdeer banalega
entrance mein jab bethoun ga
koyi mto ho jo dikha dega"

PINKY:

arey bhayaa tu pagal hai
tu kya 11 pass karlega
itna uncha too mat soocha kar
aqal to teri kuch bhi nahin
mujhe dekh khud seekh lega

PINTA:

Hello

PINKY:

koun

PINTA:

mein boul raha houn

PINKY:

kamaal hai.. yahaan se bhi mein boul rahiy houn

PINTA:

mera 10th ka result nikal gaya..

PINKy:

acchaa,,, kya koyi position hai

PINTA:

han meri position bohut kharaab hai..
tu bata teri doctory kesi chal rahi hai

PINKY:

arey ka bataoun..

gajar our palaq ke scientific naam yaad karte karte mughe apna naam bhool gaya..

PINTA:

tu too pagal hai.... mein ne tere liye ek chheeez layi hai

PINKY:

achaaa kya???

PINTA:

mein ne zaina kadal se thodi si aqal kharidey
poorey pachas rupey ki

PINKY:

Merey phone mein bohutkam paise hain bye

PINTA:

Achaa beth phir GOOD NIGHT...


.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
JUST TIME PASS

MOVE OVER TO

www.yembarzal.com

" comments

www.yembarzal.org

Yembarzal.org is cool...
Try and catch up with Pinta there...

It is absolutely...

FREE comments